Thankfully, since Tim Noakes introduced us all to Banting, people are starting to realise what real food actually is. I am eternally grateful to him. But there is still a massive part of the population that fit into the category described in the first paragraph.
When I am discussing kids and what they can and can't eat and drink, and I make a comment like, "Well, my kids just won't eat or drink that," I get horrified looks. They're always followed by the question, "How will you ever enforce that?!" Even GLM says, "How are you going to keep that stuff away from them?" The truth is, I can't really say right now because we don't have kids...YET. What I CAN say that our kids will grow up knowing, and eating real food. Whatever they eat at home will have been made in my kitchen. There are NO convenience foods in our house right now and I don't see why that should change when we have kids. I can say that with absolute certainty. I have to hope that, given that kind of foundation, they will make good choices.
I think that, how you react to food, and your relationship to it, is going to make a big difference to how a child reacts to food. They watch you all the time and they learn from everything you do. If you are on a constant diet, trying to lose weight, and you complain about eating salad all the time, do you really think a child is going to find salad appealing? If you happen to mention that you'd love to just be able to eat as many sweets as you want, without getting fat, your child is going to associate sweets with happy thoughts too. If you make processed foods out to be something yummy but untouchable, your child is ALSO going to feel the same way and they are going to be drawn to them.
As a real foodist, I definitely evaluate what goes into my mouth. I contemplate the nutritional value of it because that's important to me BUT the list of options never includes anything processed because I don't consider them options. In terms of evaluation, what I'll be considering is, "Do we need to add some Vitamin D to our diet this week? Ok then, time for some eggs!"
While I hope my kids ALSO consider the nutritional value of food, I guess there IS the fear that I might instill food neurosis in my kids. We all want our kids to enjoy food without obsessing over it; to have healthy appetites but to not feel like, once they have one piece of cake, that they need to eat the whole cake because of some kind of emotional issue or other. We want them to feel comfortable walking away because they've had enough, not because they're counting calories or nutrients.
It is so important that kids develop a healthy relationship with food. It should never be seen as a punishment or a reward because that is a surefire way of creating an emotional attachment to food. It's important to keep things neutral. There is no "good" or "bad" food. An attitude like that tends to create eating behavioural problems. Kids who have a healthy relationship with food recognise their own satiety cues and never feel a need to binge. If you are forced to finish all your vegetables before you are allowed to have ice cream you are immediately setting up a punishment/reward scenario. The child will feel the need to “make up” for times when they may have been deprived or “reward themselves” by binging on an entire packet of biscuits.
Interestingly enough, how we react to food all starts before we’re even born. Adults whose mothers were exposed to extreme calorie restrictions, during the first half of their pregnancies, are 80% more likely to be obese as adults. Our amazingly intelligent bodies will program themselves to prepare for a life of either scarcity or abundance, depending on the conditions they find themselves in. So, if you are terrified of putting on too much weight in the beginning of your pregnancy, and you hold back on calories, you aren't giving your child much of a chance when it comes to food.
As a pregnant mom, it is so essential to get a healthy balance of protein, fat and healthy carbs in your diet. In terms of fats and carbs, a lot of moms make the mistake overloading on wholegrains, seeds and nuts, thinking they're actually good for them. The truth is, when it comes to wholegrains, unless you are going to prepare them correctly, you'd actually be better off eating refined grains. I know, you're going to think I'm nuts but honestly, since people started focusing more on wholegrains instead of refined grains, even more gluten and wheat intolerances have sprung up. That's because our bodies aren't designed to digest wholegrains that aren't prepared properly and that's going to lead to a whole bunch of issues like leaky gut and IBS and malnutrition. Read up here to see exactly why they're a problem.
Seeds and nuts give you the same kind of problems for the same reasons but there is an even bigger issue with eating too many of these. Nuts and seeds are very high in linoleic acid, a type of polyunsaturated fat. Scientist will tell you polyunsaturated fats are good for you. They're not really. We need minimal amounts of them and we all get far too much in our diets already. Did you know that animals consume large amounts of linoleic acid just before autumn so that they can slow their metabolisms down enough to hibernate for the winter? Research has shown that it has the same effect on humans so, by eating lots of seeds and nuts, you are actually slowing down your metabolism.
There is a vast difference in breast milk from woman to woman, depending on their diet. Moms who eat large quantities of linoleic acid, which, as I've said, is found in nuts and seeds (and liquid vegetable oils like corn, soy, canola, and cottonseed), not only slow down their own metabolism, but also produce a lot of arachidonic acid in their bodies and milk. Arachidonic acid is converted from linoleic acid. Arachidonic acid is highly inflammatory. If you have high levels of arachidonic acid in your breast milk, you will transfer that to your baby which will mean your baby will have a slow metabolism as well as inflammation. What you eat, and how you eat it is going to directly impact your child and their future. Yes, there is nothing more nutritious than breast milk for your baby. But remember that your body makes breast milk based on the fuel you give it to use so your baby literally eats what YOU eat.
A child with a slow metabolism is probably going to develop a bad relationship with food simply because, in this day and age, where the skinny woman and the lean, muscular man are placed on a pedestal, your child with the slow metabolism is going to feel like they don't match up. If they are overweight, then the minute you place restrictions on them, they are going to latch on to the punishment/reward scenario and, once food has lost its neutral position, that child has less chance of NOT obsessing over food. That will go with them into adulthood.
A child shouldn't diet. (No-one should in my opinion, but especially not a child) They shouldn't see certain foods as good or bad. A child should eat simply because they're hungry and not because some foods make them feel better about themselves, or because mom says they're "out of bounds". The minute you give food any kind of control over your life, you are setting yourself, and your kids up, for a lifetime of weight problems.
The simple solution is to provide your kids with what they need nutritionally. Don't ever bargain with treats, don't force them to finish everything on their plates, don't make one food seem less or more appealing than another food and allow them to set their own pace when it comes to eating food. At the same time, they need to know that the food on the table IS the only option and it's that simple. Children battle to make big decisions, so make the decisions for them and, if that is what they know, and what they've grown up with, they won't know to think some foods are "gross" or "yucky" because you've never given them that impression. Don't stock your cupboard with sweets and biscuits. If you want to give them a sweet treat, bake something and get them involved so that they see, and experience the reward of making food from scratch.
It's a great lesson for them to learn that foods don't actually magically appear on the grocery store shelf. When our 6 year old nephew came to spend some time at our house, he was enthralled by the fact that I had tomatoes growing in the garden. He was so excited he couldn't want to eat it! And he was also a little confused that our tomatoes came from the garden, but theirs came from the shop! As far as he was concerned, that's where all food came from. To learn that it might be possible to grow his own food was a thrilling thought for him.
If you lead by example, in other words, you don't pull a face at food, or get picky about certain foods, and don't let them see food as controlling YOUR life, then they will have NO reason to develop an issue with food. I think that the biggest danger to your child's relationship with food, outside of family, will come from advertisers. Children are SO susceptible to their strategies. Keep the tv off and rather let them watch a movie while they are at such a young, impressionable age. Even better, give them books to read or send them outside to play in the garden. If you inspire kids to move, they will also move as adults. Kids who eat a real food diet will have abundant energy, very few mood swings (aside from the terrible 2 tantrums!) and no allergy issues. They will be full of vitality and that's what you want for them.
They will also LIKE feeling good and they'll notice when they don't. It'll probably be after a friend's birthday party where high fructose corn syrup was in abundance;) They are smart. They'll figure it out eventually and, hopefully, make the right decisions for themselves. THAT is first prize.
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